Band Perfectly Fine With Africans Starving

Svelte are apparently too busy to feed starving Africans.

AUCKLAND—Rock band U2, is well-known for its human-rights advocacy, particularly its ongoing campaign to eradicate poverty in Africa. Lesser known to music fans, local band Svelte, say they’re perfectly okay with the dismal plight of Africa’s poor.

"Yeah, that Africa stuff is U2’s thing" Svelte’s singer Tim Stewart said. While "not opposed" to Bono’s tireless efforts to improve the quality of life for impoverished third world citizens, Stewart is apparently too busy to spearhead an anti-poverty initiative of his own. "I’m sorry, but it just doesn’t mean all bands have to save the world. Ever since I discovered rock ’n’ roll music has been my passion and I’d be lying if I said it was something different like helping people."

Svelte’s guitarist, Ben Sciascia had this to say about the compassion displayed by U2, "I don’t mind if U2 pursue other interests, but I really try to focus on the guitar riffs that give Svelte its characteristic sound." Svelte’s drummer Jamie Woolright added: "You can’t reach the top of this business by feeding people aye." Source = The Onion

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