Huge Zit Threatens OdESSA Gig

Unlike grubby boys, daddy’s perfect little angel doesn’t get zits, pustules or cysts.

AUCKLAND–Svelte's enigmatic guitar player, Ben Sciascia, is reportedly worried about a gigantic zit currently plaguing his right cheek. In a blithering splutter of half-truths and fictitious angular spin, Svelte's PR firm, Pizazz PR, told reporters there was nothing to worry about saying: 'One of the names being considered for Svelte's debut EP is Clearasil Calamity, Pus-Bag Hilarity...' and that 'the current situation will provide a fantastic photo opportunity for the cover artwork'.

Meanwhile, sources close to Wellington band OdESSA, say the band has serious misgivings with regard to possible zit hi-jinks, and that the band's bass player, Paul Mouncey (introduced to Svelte only as 'Paul') told OdESSA's guitarist and lead singer (introduced as 'Armitage' and 'Pender') that OdESSA's drummer, Matt 'Puba' Swain, is still fuming over Svelte mistakingly calling Puba 'Pablo' while performing with them last month.

Svelte's lead singer, Tim Stewart, later told reporters his head was awash with unchristian-like first names and felt extremely befuddled. He was apologetic regarding the incident but was also relieved to hear that the names used by OdESSA, were nicknames: 'I'm very sorry and hope that 'Puba' Pablo picked peppers, but Run rocked rhymes. Humpty Dumpty fell down, that's his hard time. He's the better of the best, best believe he's the baddest. Perfect timin' when I'm climbin' I'm a rhymin' apparatus. Lot of guts when he cuts, girls move their butts. His name is 'Puba' hear him play, he must be nuts.'

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